Friday, November 21, 2008

Skinny G needs a vacation

By now you’ve seen it.

By it I mean my Governor, Sarah “Skinny G” Palin, giving an interview to KTUU in front of a guy slaughtering turkeys. If you didn’t here it is:

This whole mess started out fine enough. She’s a former small-town Mayor who is currently a small-state Governor who likes to do folksy small-town stuff like doing a photo-op pardoning a small-town turkey before Thanksgiving.

It’s an odd tradition but it’s quaint. It’s cute. It’s even symbolically humane.

Then it started to turn odd. She made it clear that just one turkey would be pardoned and that the rest were good eatin’. Fair enough. She’s a hunter, she’s probably even a scavenger, and she’s a politician so she’s naturally inclined to give with one hand and take with the other. Again, odd but almost cute.

Then she gives the post-pardon interview. And you either knew what you were seeing in the background or you weren’t sure at first. But yes, as a matter of fact, it was a guy in blood-stained Carhartts putting a turkey upside down into a funnel thing then cutting off its head and letting the blood drain into a trough. And then a second turkey.

Gore times 2. (Something of a Republican nightmare pun, that)

All the while she’s talking about the Presidential campaign and saying really ironic things, given the slaughter in the background

“.. it’s pretty brutal…”

Then during the death-throws of the second turkey

“… Oooh, this was, this was neat. I was happy to get invited to participate in this, for one you need a little levity in this job… it’s just nice to participate in something to promote a local business and that’s not so heavy handed politics that invites criticism. Certainly we’ll invite criticism doin’ this too but at least this was fun…”

When asked what she was cooking for Thanksgiving

“I’ll be in charge of the turkey. Yeah, my sisters and my mom will be bringin’ everything else but I’m always in charge of the turkey…”

Then, as God is my witness and please re-wind and look at it again if you have to, she gives a crazed stand-up comedian look and then finishes

“so I’m where I need to be today.”

Actually I think Skinny G needs to do the traditional Alaskan holiday thing and be in Hawaii. And not Oahu but on a tiny island far away from TV cameras and reporters.

We’ll be okay. She was gone for a month or so and we did fine. She’s had a very full summer / fall (well both “autumn” and “fall” as it turns out) and she needs some alone time.

Please Skinny G.

For yourself, for us, for America, and for The Iraq - take a vacation. We’ll all still be here when you get back.

And bring back some chocolate-covered macadamia nuts, Alaskans love those things.

1 comment:

Erin said...

Isn't it scary how close she came to being in the White House?!