Sunday, March 12, 2006

New words

I love malapropisms.

I love to say the word 'malapropism.'





It's even fun to type. Try it.

Also try slipping these lovely words into your next cocktail party, business meeting, or anti-technology manifesto:

When folks use words incorrectly it often leads to a disastrophy.

If several folks use words incorrectly it could cause wide-spread pandalerium.

I can't count how many times I've had callers who wished to be unanimous.

Once a lady told me her neighbors were trying to use her as an
escape goat

A weight loss surgery patient on a WLS board my wife frequents complained of a high anal hernia (yeow!)

I won't even get into the presidential gaffs and slips of the tongue.
Actually there is a Bill Clinton joke in there somewhere.


Dr.John said...

All of those words are too big for me because I cam't spell. If I could spell I would have had a really funny comment.

Still Searching... said...

Heh heh...

Bill German said...

i was watching the achorage news feed on an IPTV and they were talkin about the recent murders there. It surprised me to think of alaska as being violent

Kentucky Girl said...

Heh! I love new words, too! Those are good ones. I'm going to try to fit those into a meeting at work to make people scratch their heads. Wahahaah!

Eric said...

Los Anchorage averages between 20-35 murders per year in a total population of just over 250,000.

We've got young wannabe gang-bangers, who account for probably a third of the homicides.

We've got domestic violence which probably accounts for another quarter.

Alcohol is a factor in a great deal of them, other drugs in a few.

We have a fairly substantial homeless population (there are lots of places to live in the woods and still be in the city, the municipality covers a square acreage about the size of Delaware) and they can be easy targets. A couple of years ago there was talk of a serial killer murdering homeless alcoholic Native women (the statistically easiest target) but after the arrest and conviction of one particular suspect (I think he was convicted of a host of charges involving moving/disturbing one of the victims but not of actually killing her) they pretty much stopped.

We're a small town with a big town attitude since well over half the population of the entire state lives here.

They don't call us Los Anchorage for nothin'

IvoryValentine said...

Hey Eric! There was an entire episode of 'Arrested Development' where G.O.B mis-used and mis-pronounced the word CIRCUMVENT, which is a word a lot of people screw up! It was pretty hilarious cause it was like he knew he was wrong and just kept trying to use it to get it right finally! It never did happen! Still hilarious though.

smussyolay said...

is anchorage different than 'los' anchorage? or is that a pet name of yours for anchorage?

Bill German said...

Oh the sadness, thinking of homeless people living in the woods freezin. What a human tragedy. I would never equate homelessness in your city. Although, it is interesting to think of the proximity of the woods to anchorage. Interesting. I have to watch more Alaska TV to find out more. I lived in kodiak for 3 months and there were no homeless, except a big stuffed bear in the middle of the town.

Eric said...

Los Anchorage is a pet name. It's just ol' Anchorage to the masses.

There are plenty of homeless shelters but the trick is that they won't take you if you are intoxicated. So the rockbottom alcoholics or the folks who don't like to follow rules of "The Man" pitch their tents, light up their Coleman stoves and buy big cases of Ice Beer (because it's got higher alcohol content?) with their panhandling proceeds (a good panhandler can make a couple hundred a day).

It's a vicious circle. We have a lot of "couch people" too who are usually dual diagnosis (mentally ill and substance abusers) who basically sleep on their friends and family's couches until they wear out their welcome and then are back on the streets.

It is sad.

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