Saturday, October 29, 2005

I Love Citizens!

People seem to love these stories. Please stop me if it gets boring.

And I realize that when I get home I'm just a citizen like these folks:

1) October 25, 2005

Woman calls 911 because she was chipping ice in her freezer and punctured the lining. She tells the fire department dispatcher that it "started spraying out some sort of gas"

Fire dispatcher asks: "so is this a freon leak?"

Citizen says "I don't know, it's a Frigidaire."

(call taken by the woman known alternative as Jerbear or TK-Ho depending on if she’s answering her cellphone or competing in a Tae Kwon Do tournament)

2) Today, October 29, 2005

Man calls me because his grandfather is having difficulty breathing. I transfer him to the paramedic dispatcher.

Medic dispatcher asks: "does he have history of heart problems"

Citizen: (talking to Grandpa): "Do you have heart problems?" then answers "Not right now"

Medic dispatcher clarifies: "Does he have a diagnosis of heart problems?"

Citizen: (talking to Grandpa): "Have you had hypnosis heart problems? (speaking more clearly for grandpa to understand) "HYPNOSIS, have you had HYPNOSIS?"

3 ) Before my time, probably apocryphal, but still a good story:

Citizen calls because she believes her husband has died in his sleep.

Medic dispatcher says "Is he breathing?"

Caller: "I can't tell"

Dispatcher: "Get a mirror hold it up to his mouth. Now tell me if you see a reflection"

Later, supervisors discussed with the dispatcher that what she told the caller was actually the test to see if the patient was a vampire, not the test for respiration.

I love my job.


TEN33GIRL said...

lol lol.. I just dunno HOW you do it. I could NEVER answer 911 calls. I bow to thee ;)

J-bro said...

Dumb phone things happen all the time.

I'm sitting at my desk at work.
The phone rings.
Naturally, I answer the phone.
The caller asks, " Are you at your desk? "

Wow, I must be pretty talented to answer the phone number they just called, and not be at that phone extension!


Rhoda IV said...

Happy Halloween!

Hilarious! That shit used to happen to me all that time when I was working c.s.

T. Willie said...

When I was Coast Guard Search & Rescue we had a guy call the station to ask us where he was. The fog had come in and somewhere along the line he became convinced that his radar didn't work if it was foggy or dark. We spent 3 hours playing Marco Polo with him until we finally found him and escorted him in. Yeah, escorted. He wasn't dead in the water, just scared of the fog:p

Eric said...

Thanks folks and a bit fat "Happy Halloween" to you too!

Lindsey said...

OMG that is hillarious...I so miss all those stories. Keep em coming, I wish I was still there :(

J-bro said...


BIG? FAT? "Happy Halloween" ?


(puts down the kit-kat bar stolen from the candy bowl)

(and the pilfered almond job - snack size )

(and the roll of smarties)

(and the baby ruth - snack size)

(and the 100 grand bar - snack size)

(and the peanut M&M - snack size)

(and the snickers - snack size)

(and the sweet tart packets)

Anonymous said...

The other day I had a call from a man who couldn't verify his address. So I asked him his name in the hopes that I could find it by looking him up. (We'll call him John Smith). After looking him up, I asked, "what's your street name?" just to make sure. (I should have asked, "what is the name of your street?") He got really angry and said, "I don't have a street name! My name is JOHN SMITH! You people don't believe anything!" I had a hard time not laughing at that one.

melissa said...

The 3rd one really made me laugh because I could hear myself say the exact same thing while my cowrokers bust up laughing at me.

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