Under the sink in the tiny kitchen in our cozy duplex is a small plastic kitchen garbage can.
In my mind the emphasis on this is: SMALL plastic kitchen garbage can.
In Kelli's mind the emphasis on this is: small plastic kitchen GARBAGE can.
Tiny difference, right?
It seems so, oh yes, until one takes into consideration the introduction of one factor into our little solid waste management system: the empty gallon milk jug.
Short Tangent: "Gallon Milk Jugs" would be a great title for specialty porn. I don’t judge people's taste in porn; I'm just sayin' it's a good name.
If one places an empty gallon milk jug into an empty small plastic kitchen garbage can, the can is now a mostly full small plastic garbage can.
If one places an empty gallon milk jug into a half-full small plastic kitchen garbage can, the can is now an overflowing small plastic garbage can.
And if one balances an empty gallon milk jug onto a completely full small plastic kitchen garbage can in such a way that when the next person opens the door beneath the sink the empty gallon milk jug springs out and bounces across the kitchen floor, well that's just mean.
Or maybe it's funny to watch your husband swear under his breath while you laugh like Hanna-Barbera's Muttley, you'd have to ask Kelli.
I know I will not win this argument: I am the husband and therefore I am wrong. I will let this particular battery fall.
Oh and I've got to go take the trash out now. There are three dirty paper towels and an empty pizza box in the small plastic kitchen garbage can.
18 comments:
*Laughing like Mutley!* Hee hee hee heee! Wait don't throw away that paper towel. It'll fill up the GARBAGE can! I love you!
K
Ask E to tell you, K, *I* laugh like Mutley when I find something really funny.
Derek feels compelled to stack items in the garbage can as if it were a refuse version of Jenga.
And, AND *AND* , if he takes the bag out, rarely replaces it with a new bag. Drives me crazy! Because, if I notice that there is no bag, I put one in, but if he doesn't notice there isn't a bag, he fills the can back up anyway.
ARRRRGGGHHH!
Although, I have to admit that the whole Jenga stacking of the milk jug so that it falls whenever your spouse opens the door... funny!
Heh heh, we recycle our gallon milk jugs so our SMALL plastic garbage can doesn't get filled with them...but...those darn pizza boxes...
My kids are able to get trash to balance several feet above the trash can. Of course when I am screaming & yelling about whoever sees the trash is too full needs to empty it, they point out that it's not even full yet! ARRRGGHH
LzZzZzZzZ
Hi Eric,
Just saw on Google News about the Augustine Volcano erupting in Alaska. Are you and Kelli OK? Is the eruption anywhere near where you live? Things in Emergency mode at work? Need any help that I can send from Florida?
well you could be completely insane (like us) and have 3 separate receptacles – one for garbage, one for recyclables and one for burnables – that way gallon milk jugs and pizza boxes & paper towels don’t fill up the garbage can – of course you practically need a separate room just for all the cans
Jas,
I also laugh like Mutley if I find something really funny! Every once in a while a snort will slip out too, which makes me laugh even harder like Mutley.
K
LMAO! Recycle those empty milk jugs and junk mail and you'll have a lot more room for trash.
You would think a beautiful state like Alaska would be more into recycling, but alas-I dont think anyone wants our empty plastic milk jugs. We are lucky to find someplace to take cans. Lower 48 has that going much more efficiently.
I think Pizza Boxes--are a HUGE issue you just have to walk them out to the big dumpster-no matter how cold outside (its 19 degrees right now), cuz if you lean them against the kitchen can-the dogs think COOL new playtoy with food residue.
I love Mutley! LOL
Oh man, too fucking funny. We had to cut down a real garbage can to fit under the sink cause Nixon liked to knock it over at night. So's I'm in the same boat as you. Glad to see you're back!
LOL - this reminds me of my youth! Until my dad, perhaps with Garbage Engineering Certification, would spot such garbage can space usage debauchery, would make us go back to the garbage can and rinse what can be rinsed, and crush the crap out of everything. Why throw out air, after all?
To this day, I can't sit right if the milk jug isn't rinsed & crushed before landing in the garbage can. Right after the jug is crushed, while still in hand, put the lid on - it will keep it from assuming it's prior shape.
I can't believe I've turned into my father...Certified Garbage Enginerd. GEEZ!
Um, that'd be me...not Anonymous mysterioso...
Oh the easy life, when trash was just trash. Living in Portland has changed the way we fill our small trash can. Recycling just wasnt easy to do in Anchorage (never thought of it actually) and in Portland it might as well be the law. The trash collectors pick up your recycle bins for free, while the other trash is more expensive than Anchorage. So it's cheaper to recycle. Oh and soda cans and bottles, you have to pay 5 cents extra to buy them so you then collect them in your garage so you can take them in to recycle them and get our 5 cents back.
And about the milk jug. My dad taught me long ago to rinse out the jug and then stomp on it to save room in the trash can.
It's not so black and white as my pictures portray (no paper or plastic was harmed in the production of these photos.. it's all digital).
Very few times will my garbage can be full of a big plastic milk jug. We don't even buy milk in jugs.
Jugs, Jugs, Jugs. It's just fun to say, even though I'm not much of a jug man. It'd be nice to play in a jug band though. anyway.
Usually it's the paper plate balanced on top of the full trash can and THEN some empty soda cans balanced on top of that. Door open, creaking sound, for the love of dog jump out of the way man! - crash.
Wait a minute - are you talking about MY garbage? Hubby, is that you?? Oh wait...thought you were referring to OUR garbage. Hmph. It's all about the crush and stomp. Grrr...
I'm definitely doing the Muttley-snigger.
Mind you, i do that a lot.
La Minxxxxxxxx
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