A little light humor

I apologize for not knowing the original source. I'll give credit when I find it.

Heckler – the documentary

I watched the movie Heckler over the weekend and it has stuck with me.

Jamie Kennedy, stand-up comic and actor, interviews fellow performers, critics, and hecklers about the ugly act of heckling.

I don’t drink and I don’t want attention directed toward me in public so I can’t imagine yelling “you suck” at a comedy show. It’s just rude.

But there’s the other side of heckling which I found thought provoking.

Blogs and bloggers.

The magic of a blog is that anyone can be a critic.

The evil of a blog is that anyone can be a critic.

This includes me.

It’s easy to forget that people, including celebrities, have feelings.

Have I ever wronged someone purposely on this blog? Maybe.

Looking back I did refer to Vincent Gallo’s movie The Brown Bunny as the "worst movie ever made" and a "corn-studded turd of a movie." I stand behind that assessment. I explained it and I didn’t say anything about Gallo’s worth as a human being so that’s nice.

But it’s easy to get into the habit of crapping all over someone you don’t know.

So new rule: I’m going to reserve the right to criticize but will attempt to be constructive or at least not abusive.

For instance - Senator Ted Stevens. Uncle Ted. He’s done many good things for this state. He’s probably a nice man. He is, however, a convicted felon and should resign from office if he has the fortune of being re-elected next week.

Then Sarah “Skinny G” Palin can appoint herself as the replacement Senator and continue on her national political career. It’d be a win-win.

“B” is for Big Fat Liar

** update 12:30hrs ** she's a confirmed liar. But she's also mentally ill so I'm taking her name out of the story.

McCain Supporter Robbed With Knife At Bloomfield ATM

PITTSBURGH -- Pittsburgh police are still questioning a 20-year-old woman who said she was robbed and assaulted at an ATM in Bloomfield because of her political views.

(name redacted) , of College Station, Texas, said she was using an ATM at Liberty Avenue and Pearl Street just before 9 p.m. Wednesday when a man approached her and put a knife to her throat.

Police spokeswoman Diane Richard said the robber took $60 from (name redacted) , then became angry when he saw a McCain bumper sticker on the victim's car. The attacker then punched and kicked the victim, before using a dull knife to scratch the letter "B" into her face, Richard said.

"She further stated that the male actor approached her from the back again and hit her in the back of her head with an object, she doesn't know what the object was, causing her to fall to the ground where he continued to punch her and kick her and threaten to 'teach her a lesson' for being a McCain supporter," Richard said.

Richard said the woman refused medical treatment after the assault, which happened outside the view of the bank's surveillance cameras. More Here

For those playing the home game, here are some clues:

1) she’s robbed at knife point at an ATM then the guy noticed the bumper sticker on her car and got medieval on her face. Hmmm, why would someone risk a successful armed robbery to go back for seconds?

2) the “B” scratch is superficial. The sort of superficial that would leave a mark but no permanent scar or damage.

3) the “B” is backwards as if done in a mirror

It would be more disturbing if I was wrong but I’m betting my bottom dollar that this woman made up the story.

Reeks of a finger found in Wendi’s chili.

Voters: Alaska Needs Sarah Back!

Sarah “Skinny G” Palin has created quite the media storm with her background, level of experience, and governing style. I know I just posted that there was nothing left to say about her but whether you like her or not, I want to make this simple plea:

DO NOT VOTE HER INTO FEDERAL OFFICE

The reason is simple.

She is the best Alaska has to offer and we cannot afford to let her go.

Her track record speaks for itself:

1. She’s a maverick who took on her own party and won the governorship based on her high level of ethics. While in office she has broken no ethics laws (rules violations, schmules violations, no laws were broken). See: Investigator: Palin abused power, Anchorage Daily News

2. She’s a master of foreign relations: Alaska has remained free from Russian attack for her entire administration, ostensibly because Vladimir Putin is afraid of rearing his head toward her.

3. Her husband is an influential member of an Alaskan Native tribe so this keeps her in the know on the special issues of Alaskan natives because (according to http://www.johnmccain.com/about/governorpalin.htm ) “Through Todd’s Yup'ik grandmother, Alaska’s Native heritage plays an important role in their family.” If she becomes vice president then there will be no Alaskan Native voice in the Governor’s mansion. See: Natives Claim Palin neglects issues, Anchorage Daily News

4. Also from johnmccain.com, “As the mother of a special-needs child, Governor Palin has pledged to all those families with special-needs children to be their advocate in the White House.” She already has a proven record of championing the cause of special-needs children in Alaska (if by championing you mean she has cut budgets of state agencies which help special-needs kids. Can’t very well coddle them, right?)

5. As Governor, her entire family has dedicated their time to conducting state business. This work by her husband and children was all done for free (except travel expenses which the state paid for) see: Palin office defends charging state for children's travel, Anchorage Daily News

She’s young, she has vast executive experience (just ask her, she’ll tell you), she just started that 40 Billion Dollar pipeline project thing. It’s clear that we still need her.

Please don’t take her away from us!!

Blabbity Blabbity Blog

I haven’t kept up with blog posts lately. Partly it’s because everything I would windge about is sort of off limits.

I can’t post about most work stuff because it’s way too easy to figure out who I am with just my first name and my job title. Plus I’d never have anything bad to say about work because that would be wrong.

I can’t post about Sarah “Skinny G” Palin because I don’t really have anything to add to the conversation. It’s all been said. Good, bad, true, false. Criticizing her further would be like kicking a puppy. Oh yeah, and I’ll never vote for her again. I’ve been disillusioned. At this point I feel sorry for her kids.

I’m going to Atlanta in November for the National Crisis Intervention Team Conference. It should be fun but it sucks that I can’t get any more time off so Kelli and I could make a vacation out of it. I like going to new places but I’m not exactly thrilled by the idea of flying for an entire day each way. Life in Alaska I guess.

Could be worse. I could live in Wasilla.

I’m not hopeful about the economy.

On one hand I’m something of a Socialist. I love the idea of nationalized healthcare and free education and food/shelter/jobs for the hungry/homeless/unemployed. In the UK they get taxed up the wazoo but they have excellent health care. Best I can tell they have decent roads and schools too. There are advantages.

On the other hand I’m cool with capitalism. Big governments have big bureaucracy and therefore big problems. Individual entrepreneurs are the backbone of our country. By the same token the banks and mortgage companies and large corporations involved in the whole mortgage-backed securities and commercial dept obligation nightmare can choke on their own vomit.

This bailout plan, while keeping us afloat (which is a good idea,) rewards these same banks and big corporations who screwed everything up. It’s socialism for rich folks and free market capitalism for poor folks. That doesn’t seem fair.

I’m not hopeful about the situation in the Iraq or the Afghanistan or the Pakistan or the Russia or the Georgia or the Ukraine.

How can we get all up in Russia’s grill for invading Georgia, a sovereign nation, when the USA invaded Iraq, also a sovereign nation?

Who would have thought that 20 years after the end of the cold war we’d be the biggest debtor state and have a bad reputation in a lot of the world and Russia would be rich and cocky?

Madness, Mayhem, and a Side of Slaw - The Verdict

The robber I posted about February 29, 2008 has been convicted and sentenced to a YEAR in jail for the spork attack.

Spork assault nets man prison

Anchorage Daily News

Published: October 17th, 2008 01:54 AM
Last Modified: October 17th, 2008 07:53 AM

A man who stabbed another man with a spork, a combination fork and spoon, earlier this year in what police said was an attempted robbery was sentenced Thursday to a year in prison for felony assault. (read the rest of the story HERE)

Heres' the original tale and my take on it:

Robber wields spork, police say

Anchorage Daily News

Published: February 27th, 2008 12:49 AM
Last Modified: February 27th, 2008 12:49 AM

A man accused of attempting an armed robbery with what appears to have been a spork was arrested Monday night, when police say they placed him at the scene of the crime through the use of KFC bags, according to Anchorage police.

Police responding to the intersection of 11th Avenue and Turpin Street at about 10:30 p.m. were told the robber tried to grab at the victim's watch, managing to unlatch it but not get it off his wrist, police Lt. Paul Honeman said. The suspect fled without stealing anything, he said.

Police located an intoxicated Peter Albert, 52, a few blocks away with a small pocketknife as well as a backpack containing a KFC bag and some sporks -- plastic spoon/fork hybrids, he said.

Police found other KFC products discarded at the scene of the robbery, Honeman said.

Though the victim reported the robber was swinging a pocketknife, the weapon may have in fact been a spork based on the four parallel scratches officers found on the victim's side, Honeman said. Police have not ruled out a knife was used, however.

Albert was being held at the Anchorage jail in lieu of $5,000 bail on a charge of first-degree robbery.

I'm not suggesting it would be fun to be shanked with a spork but if you examine the contents of any random bag of KFC I wonder how far down the list the spork would be in terms of things which are deadly.

1. chicken injected with enough fat and chemicals that, while tasty, it will make your poop turn green.

2. mashed potatoes, corn, baked beans in sauce - carbs carbs carbs

In fact, that stick they use for the corn on the cob is probably more deadly than the spork.

Yet its just this kind of resourcefulness which gives me hope for the survival of society. If this suspect had used his ingenuity for the forces of good we'd already have solved this global warming problem and I'd be spending my time sharpening sporks to fend off all the polar bears.

Or not.

photo: http://blogs.townonline.com/somerville/?p=11241

Herb Shaindlin 1930 - 2008

Tonight we mourn the loss of Herb Shaindlin, an icon of Alaskan radio and among the very best journalists in our state's history. He will be greatly missed.

His children have set up a MySpace site at www.myspace.com/herbshaindlin
In their words:

"We wanted to give the public who loved our father so much
a place to share and send their wishes.

Thank you to everyone who listened to and watched Dad
all the years he was doing what he loved so much.

He loved journalism in its purest form.

He loved being the center of attention.

Most of all he loved making people think."

I'm going to take this opportunity to re-run a story which many readers originally thought was a eulogy. Although it was not intended as such, it serves that purpose today.

originally posted October 2, 2005:


Herb Shaindlin’s talk radio program "The Public Opinion Hotline," which aired on AM 750 KFQD for most of my life and certainly all of my formative years, educated me in more ways than I have time to list on this post so I’ll give you just a few examples:

One is that Herb’s program introduced me to the works of Stephen King, Tom Lehrer, Spike Jones, Robert Service, and many other artists. One taste of each of these artists led to exploring most of their works and works of similar artists. In this way he set my compass on the course I have taken ever since.

The second is that he told stories of his life. Many of these stories rattle around in my head to this day.

Last night I saw a helicopter fly past my house at relatively low altitude, creating a certain amount of noise in its wake. From its direction of travel (and the few helicopters that would have any reason to fly over my house) I could identify it as the LifeGuard Air Ambulance.

As I watched it pass I had to smile as I was reminded of one of Herb’s stories. If memory serves, the story goes like this:

When Herb was growing up in Brooklyn, New York, he would constantly hear the wailing of all types of sirens: police sirens, ambulance sirens, fire engine sirens. He once asked his mother if the sirens bothered her or worried her because every siren meant that there had been a crime or an accident where someone was probably hurt.

Her response was a surprising “No.” She explained, “Every time I hear a siren I don’t get mad because it is interrupting my peace and quiet; rather I am happy because I know that someone is racing as fast as they can to help someone else. Sirens are a happy sound.”

Ever since hearing this story (at least 20 years ago) I have smiled a little when I hear a siren. And now I smile at helicopter noise too.

Thanks Herb, you are the very best.

Have a Biohazard Birthday

Happy Birthday to Drew, my youngest brother. His birthday was the 26 of September but this is the most timely I have given him a gift in maybe 10 years.

I wanted to make something appropriate but kind of evil looking. My mom was the one who came up with the biohazard symbol since Drew is a an engineer working in the environmental remediation field. His degree is in nuclear engineering but the radiation symbol is pretty boring. We agreed the biohazard symbol was much cooler.

Kelli was the one who suggested I use black as the background instead of using a clear or a light color. It worked perfectly.

Braking News!!

Today’s safety tip brought to you by the return of The Summer of Love.

Yesterday there was a 4 car accident in our fair city caused by the second most dangerous type of driver*. This female driver was DWBB, Driving While Bell Bottomed.

The driver caused the accident when she tried to brake to avoid a vehicle which had slowed quickly in front of her. Unfortunately she got the leg of her flared jeans caught on the gas pedal as she was trying to move her foot from the gas to the brake. A chain reaction ensued, fortunately causing no injuries, just vehicle damage.

Beware of flares – they are unsafe at any speed.

*The number one most dangerous driver is one who text messages while they are driving. Talking on the phone is bad enough but text-messaging?? One might as well be playing with your PlayStationPortable and cooking in your Easy Bake Oven on the highway. Mo-rons.

~

Incidentally, being a typical Los Anchorage accident it involved:

a Toyota Highlander,

a Ford Explorer,

a Honda Civic, and

a Landrover.

In Alaska those whose vehicles are more “green” end up getting black and blue in traffic accidents.

Outrageous (and not in a good way)

I’m not even talking about the 700+ Billion Dollar bailout of very private enterprises with very public monies. Although that’s so outrageous I can’t even blog about it right now.

I’m talking about the political rhetoric these days. For instance:

1) Florida Rep. Alcee Hastings on Wednesday warned two minority groups to beware of Sarah Palin because “anybody toting guns and stripping moose don’t care too much about what they do with Jews and blacks.” (FoxNews)

What? Firstly, moose is kosher (albeit not without the proper slaughtering techniques and supervision). I’m not Jewish but I’m pretty sure the Jews and the moose have a reasonably decent relationship. I can’t find any evidence of blacks having moose difficulties either.

Leave the moose out of it Representative Hastings. Dumbass. *

2) During Republican Vice Presidential candidate Sara “Skinny G” Palin’s interview with Charlie Gibson “Gibson alluded to McCain's recent statement that Alaska's proximity to Russia lent Palin some expertise on that nation, asking Palin to explain.

’They're our next-door neighbors and you can actually see Russia from land here in Alaska -- from an island in Alaska,’” (LA Times)

Stop it. Here’s a map.

Here’s the Wikipedia entry. Nothing of significance is on either Little Diomede (USA, population 144) or Big Diomede (Russia, population ZERO). The only time Russian forces will storm across the Bering Strait from Kamchatka to Alaska is when you play RISK.

The distance between Magadan, Russia (the most significant city in Siberia and Anchorage’s Sister City) and Anchorage, Alaska is 1,958 miles (roughly calculated with Google Earth). Moscow to Juneau is 4,533 miles.

We are close to Russia like we are close to Japan, Korea, China, etc. In fact Wasilla, Alaska, to Singapore, China, is 4311 miles.

So except for wanting our natural gas pipeline to go through Canada, she has no experience with any foreign relations. To imply otherwise is disingenuous at best.

3) The Obama campaign ran an ad saying McCain is so out of touch technologically that he doesn’t even use the internet or send email.

Who the falafel cares?

Apparently, due to his POW related injuries, he gets shoulder aches when he uses a keyboard or does other repetitive tasks so he relies on his wife or his staff to do these things.

What President is sending his own emails anyway? Do you think George Bush types “OMG we need 700 Brazillian dollars? What’s the exchange rate anyway on those – LOL !”

Your staff does that sort of thing, that’s why you have them.

4) I want to give Skinny G’s folks the benefit of the doubt but they come off as aloof and inept. She won’t answer questions including whether she supports Don Young or Ted Stevens. (Politico)

From this Alaskan’s point of view she should have a public opinion on that. Either she’s a loyal Republican supporting two senior statesmen despite current controversy or she’s a maverick standing against her party for the good of Alaska. She has to pick a side on this.

She also won’t let her staff or her husband comply with subpoenas or aid the investigation surrounding a simple personnel issue. This begs the question why won’t she just say, look, here’s the deal” and get it over with.

~~

It’s clear we have a lot at stake with this election. So let’s cut the crap and make the candidates talk about real issues in a clear and calm way.

Is that too much to ask?

* This reminds me of Blood On The Snow, a true moose story. I crack myself up.

Photos:
Russia Alaska Map
Risk

Please Don't Lash Me, Skinny G

Fun is fun but you'll not hear any serious criticism of Skinny G from me.

This is due to either

a) there is nothing negative or even mockable about the lovely and capable Mrs Palin

or

b) according to the New York Times her staff has contacted at least one local blogger to tell them to "Stop blogging right now!." Read it here (and I didn't make up the headline)

Once Elected, Palin Hired Friends and Lashed Foes

I really don't care to write a political blog anyway but even if I had such an urge I'm not nearly anonymous enough to take on the possible future President of the United States (who are we kidding anyway?)

My readership is probably 25 regular readers (thank you all) but I sort of know people who know people and therefore I'd be on a tight leash if I crossed any real lines. I'm not going to put my employment at stake, thank you very much.

So no more Skinny G talk.

Tina Fey and Amy Poehler, however, are HILARIOUS!

Ask for a crab

Kenni from work asked for a crab. This is the result.

Joseph Lostrangio - A Memorial

(originally posted September 11, 2006 as part of The 2996 Project administered by D. Challener Roe in which bloggers memorialized each victim of the terrorist attacks on September 11, 2001 individually)


Those who have read my blog already know about my love for guitars and my complete inability to find the patience or will to master them. Today I'm going to tell you about a guitarist I never met. His name was Joseph Lostrangio.

Joe never met a six string he didn't like and he was an avid player. Friends remember him playing Billy Joel tunes with zeal.

Joe also had a love of saltwater fish. He had four tanks including a 90-gallon showpiece. Have you ever tended a saltwater fish tank? It's not a walk in the park. His enthusiasm was infectious and many coworkers learned how to care for their own fish through Joe's guidance.

Joe had a lot of enthusiasm and many diverse interests. His wife of 26 years, Theresann, called him "a life explorer."

Joe and Theresann lived in Langhorne, Pennsylvania. By all accounts he was a good father to their two children and a good husband. He encouraged the kids to follow his example of devouring new experiences and supported their talents and interests.

Speaking of devouring, Joe had another passion: food. Some friends called him a gourmet chef but others suggested it went way beyond that. He was fearless with food and tried as many exotic ingredients as he could find, often querying staff members of New York restaurants about how to find the next, weirdest ingredient yet.

Which was probably yet another reason Joe was excited about his new job in New York City. He grew up in Long Island and went to New York Law School in Chinatown. He worked as a reinsurance consultant and often visited the city but the new job with the Devonshire Group would put him in the heart of the financial district. And it put him near some great restaurants where he could learn tricks and procure new culinary delicacies.

His son, Joe Jr., was attending St John's College and they agreed to share an apartment so that Joe Sr. would have a place to stay whenever he would be unable to commute home. It was a perfect arrangement.

His first day of work was September 10, 2001. His office was on the 77^th floor of 1 World Trade Center (the North Tower). He called a friend at about 5pm that evening and left a message for them to meet at a Chinese restaurant later that week. Later he called Theresann from the apartment and they discussed family news, what bills needed paying, and that he would call her from work in the afternoon the next day, as was his habit.

I hope they told each other they loved each other. I suspect they did.

The next morning at 08:26 am, hijacked American Airlines flight 11 struck the North Tower somewhere between the 93^rd and 99^th floor. One hundred and two minutes later WTC1 collapsed.

Joseph Lostrangio was 48 years old.

I never knew you, Joe, but researching your story has made me sad that I did not have the opportunity to make your acquaintance and call you a friend. Perhaps you could have taught me to master that silly F chord.

You have inspired me and challenged me to devour life. Yours was cut way too short but you made the most of it.

"… I'm not sure about a life after this
God knows I've never been a spiritual man
Baptized by the fire, I wade into the river
That is running to the promised land

In the middle of the night
I go walking in my sleep
Through the desert of truth
To the river so deep
We all end in the ocean
We all start in the streams
We're all carried along
By the river of dreams
In the middle of the night…"

Billy Joel – River of Dreams

~~

This memorial is part of The 2996 Project administered by D.Challener Roe.
You have done an amazing thing Mr. Roe.

Sources:

The New York Times
Wikipedia

September 11 Victims: Joseph Lostrangio

9-11 Heroes: Joseph Lostrangio

Legacy.com: Joseph Lostrangio

September 11 Class Action: Statement of Theresann Lostrangio

De Plane, De Plane !

A gift for my former Sgt, Richard Stouff, recently promoted to Lt. Now that he's not in my direct chain of command I can say that he's a class act without it sounding like brown-nosing.

He's a pilot, by the way. Thus the whole plane thing. It's not perfect but I think it came out okay for my first 3D piece. And it's a kaleidoscope but that doesn't photograph well.

Skinny G for VP… for real !

Thanks to Jen for asking about my view on the whole deal. Here it is:

Why, oh why, did John McCain pick Sarah Palin as his running mate?
It just makes no sense.

Sarah "Skinny White Chocolate Latte Gets It All Over Town" Palin (aka "Skinny G") a year ago was the queen of the world. She was elected because she was by far the most ethical candidate running for governor.

I even talked about her as a possible VP choice January 3rd of this year. Actually here's my whole Skinny G file (clickity doo) If it do say so myself some of the posts are pretty funny (even if you just look at the pictures).

Yet lately she’s been tarnished by two really stupid moves on her part:

1) She allegedly used her influence to get her ex-brother in law fired from his job as a state trooper. When that didn’t work she fired the commissioner of public safety, citing no real reason initially.

Her brother in law is likely a scumbag and there’s no secret Sarah and her husband Todd (who really needs to get a hobby and keep himself out of actual government business – he’s no Hilary Clinton that one) most definitely and admittedly did their best to get the guy fired. That shows great support of her sister but not all that good judgment as governor.

2) A few days before the election this week she “took off her governor hat” and endorsed voting against a proposition which was pro-clean water but anti-mining (or actually anti one proposed mine in particular). This might have actually violated the law. You can’t take off your “governor hat” and you can’t endorse any propositions as governor. The are laws about this sort of thing.

These are small beans compared to “Uncle Ted” Stevens who was just indicted on corruption charges involving receiving lavish gifts from oil service companies and not reporting them as contributions.

Then there is Representative Don Young who has spent nearly a million dollars on legal fees in anticipation of corruption charges of his own. He might not have even won his primary race this week (too close to call). Although I try not to speak ill of Don Young because he'll bite me like a mink.

I voted for Sarah Palin for governor. I tend to like her even though I’m not a Republican. But why would McCain pick a running mate with way less experience than Obama who has current troubles of her own? What is the McCain vetting process?

If Obama is not our next President then it’ll be final: Americans are idiots.

It’s your choice folks.

Bastards!

I realize this is a radical move for me but I encourage all friends of The Panic Blog to boycott Telekomunikacja Polska. Yep, I said it and I intend to prevent them from getting any of our hard earned zlotys.

'Phoney' queues used to spur Polish iPhone launch

Aug 22 12:05 PM US/Eastern
From Breitbart.com

Poland's biggest telecoms operator, Telekomunikacja Polska, acknowledged Friday that it had paid young, hip-looking film extras to stand in queues for the national launch of Apple's iPhone.

"It was a marketing move. We thought it was a pretty interesting strategy," TP spokesman Wojciech Jabczynski told AFP.

TP is controlled by France Telecom, which owns the Orange mobile telephone brand.

The iPhone, which had its initial launch in the Unites States in July, went on sale at Orange's Polish stores on Friday after the stroke of midnight (2200 GMT Thursday).

In other parts of the world, Apple fans have stood in line for hours -- and sometimes days --- to get their hands on the new iPhone.

On Thursday evening, apparent queues began forming outside Orange's stores across Poland, with some in the line offering to sell their slot to passers-by for 100-300 zlotys (30-90 euros, 45-135 dollars).

"The aim was to attract attention. The people in the queues told passers-by about the iPhone," said Jabczynski.

Such a marketing ploy is ironic in Poland because queues were a regular and much-loathed feature of daily life until the fall of the country's communist regime in 1989, because of endless shortages of even the most basic goods.

Jabczynski said TP was pleased with the results of the launch but declined to reveal any figures.

"We couldn't have expected the same kind of fever as in the United States given that Apple's products aren't that well-known in Poland and in central Europe in general," he said.

"A total of 38,000 people signed up on our website to be kept up to date about the iPhone before the launch," he said. "Interest for Apple's phone is growing all the time."

The iPhone was also launched on Friday in Poland by one of the country's other four mobile operators, Era, which is controlled by Deutsche Telekom.

This is some incredible bullshit. Not the fake enthusiasm necessarily but the people in line offering their spots for money.

If you try to trick me into bribing someone extra to buy your stupid-ass product I guarantee I’d tell all my friends to stay away from your company.

Which I just did.

FU Telekomunikacja Polska.

FU running.

although you've now warned me against ever standing in line for any product for any reason so serdecznie dziękuję for that.

Bedeviled by Bevels

Kelli likes crosses and she likes green (and her mom gave me lots of green glass) so I decided to surprise her with a stained glass cross. I picked a Celtic cross because it goes with the whole green theme plus I'm a fan of the Celts (the Irish ones not the Bostonians although, so long as Kobe Bryant is a Laker, them too I guess – but I digress).

It started with that bevel in the middle. See it? It's not elliptical, it's an oval. Although not idea I was working with what I had on hand.

What I didn’t expect was that I was going to screw it up so bad. Usually I solder the pieces upside down so that the front lines are cleaner. I didn't figure out that with the height of the bevel I couldn’t go that route until after I had tried to tack-solder the whole thing.

Crap. It was a mess. I had to rip it all apart and, much like a petulant child, I figured I was done with glass for today and maybe with this piece altogether since it would require unfoiling all the pieces then re-washing and drying and then refoiling to get it right. Blah!

After walking the dog, who reminded me I was ignoring her, I decided to put on my big girl's pants (or something much more masculine) and just start again.

Taking all the foil off is a big pain in the ass since you have to remove all of the old adhesive so that the new foil will stick properly. This is a time consuming, tedious deal. Did I mention that it's a pain in the ass?

After it was over I had a very dull Xacto blade which was replaced just the day before but the pieces were back to where I needed them.

The reason I like all these crafty hobbies is that they teach me patience and force me to slow down. This piece certainly has lived up to that expectation.

Incidentally this is a pretty big piece for a sun-catcher (9 1/2 inches) and with all the small interior pieces couldn’t possibly support its own weight so I got to solder support wire on the back of a piece for the first time.

Fun stuff.

Commissioned Work

I cannot promise I'll ever actual do them but if you email me a picture of what you'd like I'd love to give the stained glass design a shot. Where it goes from there depends on whether I'll actually be able to do it.

SugarBaby Stained Glass

It started with a picture of our dog as a puppy


Then, using Photoshop, I made a stained glass design (all rights reserved, thank you)

then I numbered the pieces (total pieces 57)



And traced it onto mylar



Then cut the mylar into pattern pieces



then I glued the pattern pieces to the glass as a guide to cutting the pieces (this is the way my mother in law works, I know other folks trace directly onto the glass using a lightbox or whatever but I'm new so I'm just doing what I know will work)



then cut and grind, cut and grind. I'm getting better at cutting so I don't have to grind nearly as much.
then foil all the pieces and assemble upside down


and then after soldering (inexpertly still, sigh) , washing, adding patina, then washing again


Next... The Who ?

we'll see

Stained Glass so far

Here's what I've done in the order I finished them.



The soldering is sloppy but I'm getting better. I'm at the literal bleeding edge of my abilities just doing basic stuff right now.

Oh yeah and that is Sharpie for the teeth of the skull. I couldn't quite pull off using wire and after burning myself twice trying I figured I'd just paint the spaces in. I think I'll be able to wash off the marker and fix it with real paint or some other way eventually. Skull version 2 will be both better and a little "darker." But that's for later.

I think I'll do Sugar Baby next. I managed to draw a very do-able design.

I have this huge "the Who" project in the works too.

I've tried to draw* a Jimi Hendrix design but it's proving much more difficult to get the face just right. He's got these little expressions that are hard to capture in bits and pieces and still be identifiable.

*by draw I mean trace using PhotoShop. I can't draw for beans.