Stool Sample

This recollection was inspired by a thought on disasterous randomness on:

Ride My Pimp

(not for kiddies, that blog)

True Story (I was answering 911 the day it happened):

A woman in her mid-twenties needed to get something off of a high shelf; she was of medium build and pure of heart. She made only one mistake, and it’s something we’ve all done: she climbs up on a chair to reach the object. The chair was one of those ubiquitous cheapo wooden bar stools that they sell at your local Wal-Mart. It has wooden pegs along the foot rest area near the bottom and is light enough to easily pick up with one hand.

She climbs aboard this rickety piece of furniture and while reaching up high, the chair breaks to pieces beneath her. The woman falls and is impaled vaginally on one of the stool legs. V-A-G-I-N-A-L-L-Y.

Luckily she does not die, but did I mention she was impaled vaginally? Sure, we joked about it. But none of us at work (especially those with vaginas) will ever pass one of those stools without cringing.

Sometimes you’re the windshield, sometimes you’re the bug.

E