What is wrong with people?

Police: 10-Year-Olds Charged In Attack On Homeless Man
Victim Suffers Serious Head Wound; 3 Boys Charged
UPDATED: 4:37 pm EDT March 29, 2007
From WKMG-TV, central Florida

DAYTONA BEACH, Fla. -- Two 10-year-olds in Daytona Beach, Fla., are
accused of attacking a homeless man who was hospitalized after a piece of
concrete was smashed into his face, according to police.

Daytona Beach police charged the two 10-year-olds, whose names were not released, and another teen, Jeremy Woods, of Daytona Beach, with aggravated battery after the three threw rocks at two homeless men in a neighborhood near Ridgewood Avenue, Daytona Beach police said.

According to police, the boys pushed John D'Amico, 58, into a concrete block wall. D'Amico fell and one of the 10-year-olds smashed a piece of concrete into his face, police said. D'Amico was transported to Halifax Medical Center with a serious head wound, police said. Local 6 showed video of the man with a black and blue face after the attack. Another unidentified 46-year-old man was not seriously injured in the incident.

Listen: I’m the first person to admit that homeless folks are not pleasant to look at. I’m not a big fan of panhandlers, public excreters, or folks who live in homeless camps around our fair city.

That being said: people are people. YOU DON’T THROW ROCKS AT PEOPLE.

What kind of fundamental derailment of moral values produces 10 year old kids who think it is okay to assault homeless folks?

And I’m not talking about religious values just basic humanity.

If these kids were chucking concrete at pets, we’d be talking about how they are about one fire and a bedwetting away from being the next serial killers. But these kids?

Tell me I’m overreacting.

** and i'm not even going to get into the fact that a lot of homeless folks are mentally ill due to the sad state of our mental health system

Up, Up, and Away in my Dumb-Ass Law

I’ve added emphasis to this New Hampshire Union Leader story:

It's $250 a pop for a balloon on the loose

CONCORD, NH – People will want to hold onto their balloons if the
Senate agrees with a House vote yesterday to ban balloon releases.

By a vote of 215 to 111, the House approved a bill that treats balloon
releases as a form of littering.

HB 62 originally barred the release of two dozen or more
lighter-than-air balloons.
The version that passed yesterday could bring a
$250 fine for even a single balloon let loose. A second offense could bring a
$500 fine. The bill specifically exempts hot air balloons, weather balloons and
others released as part of scientific research.

The bill does not penalize accidental releases.

Those who favored the bill said the balloon materials, including the
attached strings and ribbons, pose a serious threat to wildlife. Whales, turtles
and seabirds that live along New Hampshire's coastline mistakenly eat floating
balloons thinking they are food, and then are unable to eat real food.

"Do we now get balloon police?" Rep. Randolph Holden,
R-Goffstown, asked.

Rep. Kevin Waterhouse, R-Windham, said police officers would be
given enforcement responsibility. A move to give the job to Fish and Game
officers was rejected, since the department is under budget pressure
already.

He said people need to be aware that balloon releases cause real harm
to wildlife.

"It doesn't just go to heaven and disappear. It comes back down again,"
Waterhouse said.
Waterhouse said he was inspired to sponsor the bill by a
group of homeschoolers studying ecology.

---------------------------------
This is another example of a great idea but an inefficient use of police resources.

How many citations are police going to give for loose balloons? Nearly none.
Soooo… what actual good does it do? Not much.

But what it does accomplish is to authorize every bee-in-the-bonnet crotchety caller to report illegal balloon deployments.

Before you complain that actual police officers will be sent to balloon calls before they are sent to a real call, it would almost never happen. The actual extra work would be in the communications centers.

I’d bet that the Emergency Communications staffs all over New Hampshire have nothing better to do than take balloon calls.

---

Hindenburg photo: www.corrosion-doctors.org

Skull-o-rama

While Kelli was visiting relatives in Alabama I did a lot of polymer clay stuff.

The most productive task was making a mold of a decent skull and then mass-producing lots of skull pins. I've made about 40 of them so far and some are much better than others. Along the way I've learned the power of mica powder and marbling. Next on my list is faux raku. We'll see.

I would need to make a light box to take decent pictures of the glazed ones.

ZZZZ from work suggested I make the skulls into cabinet knobs and other ornamental items besides pins. Thus came "Big Wild Death" or at least its first incarnation.

Terrible Two's

I started this blog 2 years and 475 posts ago.

I've made some cool friends along the way and I've reconnected with old friends and for that I am grateful.

That's it. Happy Blogoversary to me.

Back to the regularly scheduled crap.

Let Your Freak Flag Fly !!

Bill would ban anatomically explicit vehicle decorations in Maryland

Updated: 2:14 p.m. HT Feb 23, 2007

ANNAPOLIS, Md. - Fake bull testicles and other anatomically explicit vehicle decorations would be banned from Maryland roads under a bill pending in the state legislature.

The measure was filed in the General Assembly on Monday by Delegate LeRoy E. Myers Jr., who says children shouldn't be exposed to giant plastic gonads dangling from pickup truck trailer hitches. The bill also would ban displaying images of naked human breasts, buttocks or genitals, with offenses punishable by fines of up to $500.

"It's time to take a stand," Myers told The (Hagerstown) Herald-Mail.

This bill died of on its own after the bad publicity but it reminds me of the benefits of freedom of speech.

I firmly believe that people should have the right to hang plastic testicles from their vehicles. I also believe that people should proudly display their Grillz.

You know why?

I could engage everyone I meet in meaningful conversation, observe their actions, and, after a sufficient period of observation, render an opinion on that person's character.

Or…

I could take one look at a set of plastic testicles or a flashy set of Grillz and immediately judge that person to be, at best, an idiot.

As a fundamentally lazy guy I appreciate folks who display their plastic testicles proudly. Brave men and women fought for your right to cling to Junior High humor long into adulthood.

I'd rant more but I've got to put that last eBay bid on the pair of platform "pimp boots" with the fish tanks in the heels. I wouldn’t want MY freedom of speech to go to waste.

MSNBC story
Followup NBC4 story
Grillz Guy
Grillz Models
Bumper Nuts
Pimp Costumes: Boots

Cheeseheads Know When To Fold 'Em

Sadly, we get this kind of thing all the time.

from the Green Bay Press Gazette:

Girl calls 911: Grandpa's cheating at cards!

Gannett Wisconsin Newspapers

BEAVER DAM — A 7-year-old girl who thought she was getting the short
end of the deal called 911 on Sunday afternoon to report her grandfather was cheating at cards.

The Dodge County dispatch center received a 911 hang-up call
from a child around 4:40 p.m. at a home on Dodge County E in the town of Burnett east of Beaver Dam, according to a report.

When officers responded, the grandmother told the deputy her young granddaughter had recently learned to dial 911 and apparently called when she believed her grandfather was cheating during a family card game, according to the report.

photo: http://www.timelesstrinkets.com/Smurfs/CollectorPages/images/20056.jpg

Cavemen - the TV Pilot

ABC has ordered a pilot for a comedy featuring the cavemen characters created for orginally for a series of Geico commercials, according to the AP/MSNBC: Geico Cavemen May Get Own TV Series

I love this idea, primarily because it presents the opportunity for the right casting (at least for a follow-up movie release).

In case you didn't see my original post, there is only one person who can play this part with a minimum of make-up:

The Geico Caveman and Val Kilmer

You be the judge.

Slang, Dirty Words, and the UK

Due to my dear friend T, who lived in England for a couple of years at the turn of the century, I was exposed to a great deal of pop UK culture during a short period of time and loved it. Embarrassingly so. Oh and candy. Lots of British candy. Two words: Malteasers = Yum.

There are lots of UK stories which I'll eventually tell but one of the things I love is British slang. Now that I'm addicted to re-runs of the Ricky Gervais podcast, the UK version of The Office, and the show Extras, I get to hear the slang again and it's so much fun.

Mind you I can't get away with actually saying many of these words and phrases because they don't sound right with an American accent. But I can think them. And thanks to Ted Duckworth's "Dictionary of Slang," now I have the spellings.

My current favorite word is: Whinge. (pronounced like "hinge" with a "w" in front)

The American word is "whine," as in "to complain."

Whining has an onomatopoetic quality to it which is nice but the hard "g" followed by a silent "g" at the end makes "whingin'" a lot of fun to say. Try it now: whingin', whingin', whingin'.

The other great UK word is the ultimate ugly word in American English: the "c-word." Yes, it's four letters long. The one that the Vagina Monologues attempts to nullify. Yes, that one.

Here one simply doesn't say it. Too much trouble. In the UK its power is similar to the "f-word" in American. You wouldn’t say it around your mom or in polite company but it has a much more broad appeal over there.

The thing I learned from our British cousins is that you can conjugate the c-word. A character in a Denise Mina novel described having a "cunting headache," which I thought was a clever way of expressing the severity of the pain. Oh and the character happened to be female, so it's not a misogynistic word. It's just really really bad. It's the worst word. So it has some power behind it.

But, and I have a very Frank Zappa attitude about this, it's just a word. It can't actually hurt anyone.

Certainly words can hurt feelings but it's not the words themselves which cause the problem, it's how the words were delivered or whatever emotional baggage we carry with us in conjunction with the words. You can do some serious damage with totally innocuous words. I once got into trouble for calling someone a "grilled cheese sandwich." I blame Sam Kinison.

Racist language is an exception. Michael Richards was out of his cunting mind when he called those folks the n-word.

But some folks will get upset about the strangest and most benign words. I think I've mentioned before that one of my brothers has a problem with the word "tasty." It just makes him cringe.

Pasta, a co-worker, has a brother who has a great deal of difficulty with the word "ointment." Granted, he is the same person who refuses to eat the part of a sandwich which he has been holding while eating the rest of it, calling those bits the "sandwich handles" which he will leave on his plate, so clearly inpatient therapy would be recommended in his case.

I'd always recommend that one chooses their words carefully but I'll add this: don't be afraid to take a chance. Provided you have a decent grasp on what it actually means, throw some odd slang into your vocabulary. Not necessarily the naughty words but just a fun new word. It feels good.

And for those who don't like slang in any form:

a) you're probably not a big fan of this blog anyway, and

b) quit your whingin', you twat!

911 is Always Open

Not only are operators figuratively "standing by" but, and this is more important, you can always call 911.

If you have a phone at home with a cord on it and it's plugged into the wall, you can call 911, even during a power outage, even if you don't pay your phone bill.

The MAN can keep you from calling locally or long distance if you don't pay them but he CANNOT keep you from calling 911.

If you only have cordless phones at home, you are screwed without power. So keep a backup phone with a cord. They go for just a couple of bucks these days.

Wireless phones: you can call 911 without even having phone service. If the battery works and if the phone conforms to the local cellular system then you can dial 911. They can shut your phone off for not paying the bill but they cannot keep you from dialing 911.

It's the law.

VoIP is a different matter and here's my whole view on that: I wouldn't depend on it.

But back to wireless phones for a sec: If you upgrade to a new cellphone make sure you have the phone company strip your info from your old phone.

You can also donate your phones to local women's shelters so that people at risk can have a phone which can access 911. I suggest you do just that: donate the phone. You might save a life.

What you don't want to do is give the old phone to your child as a toy. It's not a toy and unless the battery is truly dead it will likely squeak out a 911 call or two even if normal calls would be hopeless.

Remember: once it's dialed, we get the call even if you hang up.

Which brings me to this news item:

Girl, 8, makes 100 prank 911 calls

Feb 20 2:26 PM US/Eastern

SHEBOYGAN, Wis., Feb. 20 (UPI) -- No charges will be filed against an 8-year-old Wisconsin girl who made more than 100 prank calls to emergency operators last week.

Lt. Jim Risseeuw of the Sheboygan County, Wis., Sheriff's Department said the unidentified girl was traced with the help of AT&T and TracFone, which identified the phone's owner as the girl's mother, the Sheboygan Press reported Tuesday.

The woman had stopped using the phone but all cell phones can call 911 even if they don't have active service.

Risseeuw said the third-grader identified herself to dispatchers as "Matthew" when she made the calls, some of which contained profanities, the report said.

However, he said because of her age, she won't be charged.

"At this point, the matter was corrected," Risseeuw said. "We'll leave it for the parents to deal with."

Breibart.com News

Note that the 8 year old cheesehead not only dialed 911 on purpose but she used profanity and adopted an alias.

Who says the public school system is failing? This girl is already qualified to be a member of the United States Congress.

~~

photos:
911
Red Phone
White Phone
Cell Phone

The Burning Flesh Smell Of Branding

But not in a creepy way.

My fair city just paid $30,000 to develop a new "brand" to advertise itself and is spending an additional $200,000 to start pimping the hell out of this brand.

The old brand was: Wild About Anchorage. They had a cute jingle and cartoon animals including Seymour the Moose. It was the 80's and I was an occasional badass babysitter*… ah the memories.

Anyway, here's the brand they came up with for a mere $30,000 of my tax dollars:

Big. Wild. Life.

No kidding, check it out HERE. (Seriously, have a look at the logo, I'd reprint it here but someone might complain - copyrights and all.)

Notice the red color splash behind the words. It looks like the splat mark made when you smash a mosquito. Well, okay, so that would be appropriate.

I would categorize the $10,000 per word brand as an incredibly bad choice if not for the town they had to work with.

Fast Food Nation by Eric Schlosser is wide-ranging but this point struck home: all the franchising in this country has served to drain most of the local flavor from each town. Los Anchorage is a prime example. Our newest feature and soon to be the hottest spot in town? Target. Yep. That's it. Target.

This is my home and I'm happy to live here but I'm not exactly sure why anyone would like to move here. There are a lot of funky little towns in Alaska and, while I wouldn't actually want to move to one, I can see the appeal of moving to one of those: wilderness, solitude, peace and quiet, etc. Los Anchorage… well…

Our civic leaders would like you to believe that Anchorage has all the advantages of a big city but retains the small-town feel and beauty of the rest of Alaska. This is not an entirely false premise but it overlooks the fact that we have our share of big city problems plus the bonus of being far enough away from the rest of the world that everything here is less available and more expensive.

Far be it for me to criticize without offering alternatives, humble as they may be.

Tell me some of your ideas!!

* Shoutout to Lyndsay, her mom, and her seeester!

Photo:

TBone Branding Iron

just bragging

Delusions of Adequacy

Cruise 'is Christ' of Scientology

By EMILY SMITH
US Editor, THE SUN (UK)
January 23, 2007

TOM Cruise is the new “Christ” of Scientology, according to leaders of the cult-like religion.

The Mission: Impossible star has been told he has been “chosen” to spread the word of his faith throughout the world.

And leader David Miscavige believes that in future, Cruise, 44, will be worshipped like Jesus for his work to raise awareness of the religion.

A source close to the actor, who has risen to one of the church’s top levels, said: “Tom has been told he is Scientology’s Christ-like figure.

“Like Christ, he’s been criticised for his views. But future generations will realise he was right.”

Cruise joined the Church of Scientology in the ’80s. Leader L Ron Hubbard claimed humans bear traces of an ancient alien civilisation.

Taking pot-shots at Scientology is too easy (as evidenced by the last line of the Sun's story) so I'm not even going to go there. I already have an opinion on Mr. Cruise (who does not believe that anyone should ever take psychiatric drugs): he is misguided at best but is probably simply a bleedin' idiot .

But Christ? Here's one reason why Tom Cruise is not like Christ:

The quote: "… Like Christ, [Cruise]’s been criticised for his views…"

I might have to consult my religious history advisor John Cowart on all the details, but I think if you take it back to the original Latin (or Aramaic) you'll discover (and everyone agrees, Jews, Christians, Muslims, Atheists, and Agnostics) Christ was CRUCIFIED for his views.

Tom Cruise: Criticized. Jesus Christ: Crucified.

So until the government tacks Maverick and his need for speed up to a tree and gets all Mel Gibson on his ass he's not the least bit like Christ.

Mr. Miscavige, you sir are an imbecile.

Photo: tomcruiseisnuts.com

Cry for Help versus Request for Help

Recently I had a powerful illustration of the difference.

One of Kelli's coworkers started acting strangely last November. Normally a relatively quiet but extremely kind man with a great sense of humor, Ben (not his real name) began talking a mile-a-minute and being otherwise boisterous and emotional. He was quick to laugh inappropriately and quicker to get inappropriately angry about trivial matters. Everyone noticed this change of behavior and he acknowledged it himself, explaining to a few coworkers (Kelli included) that he was going through a rough patch. He also mentioned he had been buying Xanax off of the internet because his local doctor would not prescribe it for him anymore.

The way the internet thing works is this: you pay for a "doctor's appointment" and you pay full price (plus) for the drugs and they get express mailed to you. Being an online enterprise, it's extremely difficult for the DEA to shut these places down. If you look, you'll find them. You will probably be able to get drugs inappropriately (read: illegally) but you might get drugs which have not been stored appropriately, you might get fake drugs, or you might not get anything and be scammed out of your money completely. And if there's a problem who do you expect to complain to? It would be a little like calling the police to report you were sold poor quality crack cocaine.

Anyway, Ben was getting progressively worse and self-medicating to the point of being dangerous. The managers at work pulled him aside and steered him to their employee assistance program. He continued self-medicating and his behavior deteriorated to the point where he was having problems putting together complete thoughts, was slurring his words, and was having problems with coordination.

January 1^st he was arrested for driving under the influence (of Xanax). He told his coworkers the next day that it had happened (and felt picked on by the police).

A few days of erratic behavior at work later he was put on involuntary leave so he could get some more intensive help.

While the whole picture (or at least the whole picture as of now) was not clear until everyone compared notes later, pretty much everyone he worked with knew he was headed off the rails. Given the erratic behavior and wild emotional swings, some coworkers were understandably concerned that he could become violent toward them. More were concerned he was a candidate for suicide. Pretty much everyone guessed it was going to get much worse before it got any better.

Every move he made was a "cry for help."

January 7^th, 2007, he was found dead at his home of an apparently unintentional prescription drug overdose. He was 39.

What an incredible waste.

Ben had family and he had friends and he had a longtime (although not live-in) girlfriend and every one of them, to a greater or lesser degree, tried to help him. Kelli had recommended specific counselors and tried her best to let him know that self-medicating was not the answer. For a strictly coworker relationship, she tried her best to help him out.

If you are close friends with someone you might be able to grab them by the scruff of their neck and drag them in for a psych eval but maybe not and definitely not if you are just a coworker.

Plus it is an essential ingredient for Ben to have actually wanted to get help. Comparing notes with his workers, friends, and family lead to the discovery that his agenda with regard to treatment was almost exclusively drug-seeking. He wasn't very successful locally so that's where the internet came in.

Ben had rights. He had the right to refuse treatment. If the police had deemed him a danger to himself or others he have been taken for a psych eval and could have been involuntarily committed to a mental hospital for no longer than 72 hours. Ditto a physician.

Friends could not have forced him into treatment.

Family could not have forced him into treatment.

Had he committed a crime (or had he been convicted eventually of the DUI) he could have been ordered by a court to either complete a treatment program or go to jail.

That's it, folks.

The only one who had the power to change things was Ben himself. He might have being "crying for help" with his actions but he never properly requested help and actively denied it in some cases.

Maybe it was pride, maybe he was not thinking clearly enough to know he seriously needed help, maybe… maybe… maybe….

The night he died he had left messages on the answering machine of his girlfriend requesting that she call him back although he knew (or should have known) that she was out of the country. I wish he'd have called a crisis line. I wish he'd have called 911.

I wish he'd have asked for help.

~~

Xanax photo: http://www.opt.pacificu.edu/ce/catalog/11466-PH/WangDrugs.html

Radio Contest Gone Awry

Here's a happy little news excerpt:

Woman in Water Drinking Contest Dies

SACRAMENTO, Calif. (AP) - A woman who competed in a radio station's contest to see how much water she could drink without going to the bathroom died of water intoxication, the coroner's office said Saturday.

Jennifer Strange, 28, was found dead Friday in her suburban Rancho Cordova home hours after taking part in the "Hold Your Wee for a Wii" contest in which KDND 107.9 promised a Nintendo Wii video game system for the winner.

"She said to one of our supervisors that she was on her way home and her head was hurting her real bad," said Laura Rios, one of Strange's co-workers at Radiological Associates of Sacramento. "She was crying and that was the last that anyone had heard from her."

It was not immediately know how much water Strange consumed…

Full Story Here

I'm hoping for the sake of the jocks involved that Ms. Strange died in a bizarre coincidence unrelated to the radio contest but if I were a betting man I'd bet it was directly related to drinking water for a video game system.

People are easily led. People will do a lot of stupid things for fame and fortune. Sorry, that's just the way it is: people… they are not always level headed.

That being said: KDND killed that woman. No silly disclaimer of "don't do this if you can't handle it" is sufficient. KDND is the responsible party. KDND is the business entity which encouraged folks to perform a dangerous activity. KDND jocks probably yucked it up as several folks just couldn’t drink any more. They likely cheered Jennifer Strange on as she kept a-drinkin'.

KDND has a lot of explaining to do but they are not the only ones. We have plenty of, dare I say, absolutely irresponsible morning DJ morons in our little town of Los Anchorage who would have done the very same thing if they'd have thought of it first.

What happened to those halcyon days when being caller number 12 was thrill enough?

We recently had a DJ get a juvenile male to come down to a radio station with some sort of pellet gun and volunteer to get shot in the ass for some hockey tickets. Hockey games are fun, sure, but offering anyone, let alone a minor, compensation for intentionally injuring themselves in public… well, it's wrong.

Maybe I'm a party pooper because I'm not a fan of Jackass-type humor or Fear Factor type challenges.

Maybe I'm a party pooper because I work for the po-po and have to field calls from angry, frightened, or confused citizens who don't listen to the particular radio station and so don't understand that the naked man running across the shopping mall parking lot is not a crazed criminal but really someone who NEEDS to win some concert tickets.

Or maybe I am a party pooper because a 28 year old woman died for a stupid reason and someone in uniform had to go tell her parents that they no longer had a daughter.

Hope the KDND jocks got a good laugh over that too.

I have to go back to work on Saturday!!!

The horror…

Okay, actually I am looking forward to seeing my lovely coworkers – plus all the rest of them, but I'm always a little anxious after coming going back to work after some leave.

This being "The Panic Blog," the reason for the anxiety is… well, it's unknown. That's the thrill of anxiety, it just creeps up on you and goes "boo!"

Kelli's workmates are dealing with an unfortunate employee death (not work related) which I'll probably write about eventually because it's so sad but I'm procrastinating doing it… because it's so sad.

And I'm still a wee bit nervous about the results of the MRI. Did I mention that I should have nothing to worry about?

Hypochondria + Anxiety = Just Want To Sleep All Day

Which is bad… so bad, for so many reasons.

But I'm okay, just venting

Oh and the mummy is 600 years old and comes from the Amazon. Pretty interesting, actually. Check it out here:

Mummies of The Amazon (Evening Standard of London)

M R I = U B TRAPPED

I'm hoping (for all sorts of obvious reasons) that the cardiac MRI performed on me today will come back with good news. It's not expected to come back with bad news so I'm not particularly worried on that front but there is a specific reason I want to bid my cardiologist 'goodbye.'

I do not want to have a cardiac MRI ever ever ever again.

It was not an "open" MRI machine.

I am, for the record, an "open" MRI shaped guy. Today they squeezed me into the equivalent of a culvert under a dirt road.

For an hour.

My arms were squeezed so close to my sides that both of my hands quickly "fell asleep" and by the end of the test I was seriously worried about permanent damage because I could no longer move several of my fingers or make a fist with either hand.

Also, there was a bit of dashed hopes in there too.

Because the test is an hour long they offer you a wide selection of music. Seriously wide. I could have chosen "Punk Rock," or "Booty Time," or nearly a hundred other categories.

My first choice was "Stand up Comedy" partly because I didn't feel comfortable enough to choose "Naughty Comedy."

This choice was quickly quashed on the grounds that laughing is discouraged during the test. Okay, no problem. Hmmmm. I don't even know what "Booty Time" is, except that it's in the "Urban" category. I guess folks in big cities listen to lots of rap and R/B. I noticed that they didn't have a "Rural" category but if they did I'd suspect you wouldn't be hearing a lot of songs by black artists. Evidently if you have a black singer in your band you are "Urban." Who knew?

By the way, let me remind you that one of the rockin'est rock bands in Rock History had a black singer: Phil Lynott of Thin Lizzy. But maybe he doesn't count because he was Irish.

There was not a category titled "Irish Rock," but if'n there was I would have picked it.

I ended up picking "Classic Rock." I like Led Zeppelin as much as the next guy and I haven't listened to most "classic rock" in quite some time so I figured this was as safe a choice as any.

As it turned out, it wouldn’t have mattered. I should have just picked "Booty Time" to see what all the fuss was. After a grand total of two songs the music system went tango-uniform.

Two songs.

"Magic Man" by Heart followed by a blues-rock guitar gravelly low-talking song (not Low Rider but close) whose name or artist or any meaningful lyrics totally escape me.

Then nothing. For an hour as my hands turned progressively into flippers I didn't get to hear any music. No distractions. Just me in my own head.

Not an entirely comforting place to be when my head starts to think of the various things I would need full control of my fingers to continue doing – my job, as only one example.

An hour later they slid me out of the machine and the blood flowed again to my fingers and a minute or so after that I had full digital dexterity. Whew.

Oh yeah and it cost a shit-load of money but I really can't complain about that part of it since my entire hospital stay last month was covered 100% by my insurance (I had met my maximum yearly co-pay due to the earlier belly-button repair surgery).

But I'm not volunteering to do it again soon if I can help it.

Now that I can cross my fingers again I'll do so until my follow-up on the 24^th.

~~

photos:

MRI unit http://www.strokecenter.org

Heart MRI picture: http://www.brighamandwomens.org/

Bullet Proof Undies Save The Day

Woman's Bra Saves Her From Bullet
Jan 05 3:22 PM US/Eastern

ST. PETERSBURG, Fla. (AP) -- One woman discovered on New
Year's Eve that her bra could do more than lift and support when a falling
bullet was halted by the bra strap on her left shoulder. Debbie Bingham, 46,
an Atlanta resident visiting family in St. Petersburg, said her gold bra slowed
the falling bullet during the holiday celebrations.

Her injuries may have been much more severe had it not been for her bra strap, said George Kajtsa, spokesman for the St. Petersburg Police Department.

Bingham says she was outside with her daughter and son, ringing in the New Year and viewing the local fireworks display when she felt a sharp pain in her left shoulder at 11:40 p.m. It was Bingham's daughter, Solanda Bingham, 30, who first noticed the blood seeping through her mother's white shirt.

"We were sitting at the picnic table and listening to music and my mom said, 'Ow,'" the daughter said.

The daughter said she looked over and saw the blood and shouted "My mother's been shot. My mother's been shot."

The bullet was halfway inside of Bingham's bra, and the other half barely breaking the skin, Bingham later told WTSP-TV.

Someone had fired a gun into the air and as the .45-caliber bullet fell back to earth, Bingham was struck. Kajtsa described the wound as a "big scratch with bruising."

Bingham was taken to Bayfront Medical Center in St. Petersburg where she was given five stitches. The bullet was lodged into the bra tap was only removed when doctors intervened and cut the bullet from the strap.

St. Petersburg police are still searching for the shooter to determine if Bingham was the target of the gunfire or if she was simply in the wrong place at the wrong time, Kajtsa said.

Shooting a weapon inside the city limits is a
misdemeanor with a maximum fine of $1,000 and up to one year in jail, Kajtsa
said.

As for Bingham, she said she is just thankful for her
bra. "It was a very cheap bra. It wasn't very expensive, and I'd love to have a
couple more of those bras," she told WTSP.

It Sucks To Get Old

Police say woman stole patients’ IDs

January 4, 2007

By CHRIS TRAINOR
Lakeland, South Carolina, Index-Journal staff writer

An arrest has been made in an identity theft case involving a contract nurse at Self Regional Healthcare.
Dianna Johnson, 55, of Savannah, Ga., was arrested by the Greenwood County Sheriff’s Office and charged with four counts of financial identity fraud….

Johnson is accused of taking the personal information— name, Social Security number, etc.— of Self Regional patients from their patient information sheets and using it to apply for credit cards. Authorities allege she took the credit cards and spent the maximum amount allowed before disposing of the card. She, of course, did not pay the accompanying bills, they say.

“Many of these patients were very elderly,” said Chief Deputy Mike Frederick. “They were the type of people who weren’t going to be checking their credit reports or applying for a credit card. It was a highly unethical situation.”

Johnson worked for Self as a contract nurse, a type of temporary work in which she would travel around and work at different hospitals for short periods of time….

Frederick said Johnson has been participating in financial fraud for more than 10 years in five states around the Southeast. He indicated the case is likely to be worked in conjunction with the Secret Service because of the long amount of time Johnson’s alleged crimes have gone on.

GCSO investigator Wayne Findley expounded on Secret Service involvement. “Johnson traveled extensively through the southern United States as part of her contract employment,” Findley said. “So we’re coordinating with the U.S. Secret Service now to ensure all these cases get wrapped up.”

Frederick said Johnson’s personal computer is likely to contain a treasure trove of evidence against her.
“She indicated to us that she had a computer which contained a large amount of evidence dating back nearly 10 years,” Frederick said….

Lakeland Index-Journal

Clash of the Retail Titans

From Central Utah's Daily Herald Saturday, December 16, 2006

Williams-Sonoma: Target is stealing designs MINNEAPOLIS -- One of the nation's trendiest home furnishings retailers has accused Target Corp. of systematically copying its designs on a range of products, from Christmas stockings to votive candleholders. The lawsuit suggests Target hides behind its vendors, insisting they indemnify the corporation from such lawsuits, at the same time it specifies precisely what products look like. Copyright infringement lawsuits among retailers and designers have become more frequent in recent years, as competition for the shoppers' wallet intensifies and mainstream retailers attempt to up their style quotient. Many of these lawsuits are dismissed or quietly settled. Williams-Sonoma Inc., which operates Pottery Barn and other chains, claims in a federal lawsuit filed Tuesday that a quilted Christmas stocking sold at Target stores contains "every distinctive element of Pottery Barn Christmas stockings," right down to the snowflakes and blue sky. More pointedly, the company says the stocking infringement is part of a "longstanding pattern of copying by Target of (Williams-Sonoma) designs for rugs, linens, tableware, furniture, lamps and other products."

For Brit Kids, It Ain't Easy Being Cheesey

From the U.K.'s 'The Daily Mail'

TV ban on adverts for cheese, the latest 'junk food'

Last updated at 08:41am on 3rd January 2007

Cheese is to be treated as junk food under new advertising rules for children's television.

Commercials promoting it will be banned during children's TV programmes and those with a large proportion of young viewers.

The rules, which come into force this month, are part of a Government drive to reduce children's exposure to foods high in fat, salt and sugar.

Much to the disgust of its makers, cheese is to be regarded in the same light as crisps, sugary cereals and cheeseburgers.

In fact, under the criteria used by the Food Standards Agency to determine junk foods, such products are actually regarded as healthier than cheese.

The ban follows evidence that TV commercials have an indirect influence on what children eat and are contributing to obesity in the young.

The Food Standards Agency model assesses the fat, sugar and salt content in a 100g or 100ml serving of food or drink.

But the British Cheese Board points out that a typical portion of cheese was 30 to 40g - not the 100g used in the agency's model.

Most cheese would be exempt from the ban if a typical portion had been used in the calculations, according to the board.

It pointed out that cheese was one of the most 'nutritionally complete' foods.

The National Farmers' Union described the decision as ' nannying gone mad'.

'To suggest there is anything inherently harmful about cheese is absurd,' spokesman Anthony Gibson said.

'There is no such thing as a bad food. It is just how much of it you eat, in what balance and how much exercise you take.'

He said the new rules were 'of no use to consumers', adding: 'It may very well put them off eating healthy things.'

Mary Quicke, who runs Quickes Cheese in Devon, producing handmade cheddar, said the rules had left her 'speechless'. ' Frankly, it's bonkers,' she told BBC Radio 4's Today programme.

She said the FSA's decision to assess cheese using a 100g portion was ridiculous. 'Imagine eating 100 grams of cheese - that's four ounces. You would have to be a pretty dedicated eater of cheese to get around that.'

Other foods banned from advertising during children's TV include: Marmite, Flora Lite, half-fat cheddar, Dairylea triangles, bran flakes, camembert, sugar-coated puffed wheat, instant hot oat cereal, Jaffa cakes, reduced calorie mayonnaise, multi-grain hoop cereal, half-fat creme fraiche, takeaway chicken nuggets, potato waffles, Greek yoghurt (from sheep's milk), ham, sausages, bacon rashers, low-fat spreads, peanuts, cashew nuts, pistachio-nuts, peanut butter, raisins, sultanas, currants, low-fat potato crisps, olive oil, butter, pizza, hamburgers, tomato ketchup, chocolate, brown sauce, cola and lemonade.

Foods which escape the ban include: Plain fromage frais, fish fingers, lasagne ready meals, currant buns, malt loaf, frozen roast potatoes, chicken curry with rice ready meal, frozen oven chips, sliced white bread, cottage cheese, supermarket frozen chicken nuggets, milk, brazil nuts, canned strawberries in syrup, diet cola and chocolate-flavoured milk.

Daily Mail